Sunday, November 13, 2011

13th of November

Today would have been Phil's 20th birthday.  We had a family brunch, which would have made Phil proud, baked eggs with proschuitto and sun-dried tomatoes, bruschetta, marinated fetta, avocado, mushrooms, fruit salad, chocolate croissants and to top it off we did a coffee run and got take out coffee.  Somehow everything synchronised and the everyone, coffee and eggs arrived and were ready at the same time!

I've felt so sad today.  Much sadder than I expected.  We spent time today talking about memories of Phil as we are trying to plan what to write on a plaque to go near where his ashes are buried.  It's a happy and sad thing hearing stories about Phil that I haven't heard before as different family members recall different events from time to time.  Mum shared one today.....

Mum and Phil were talking about heaven on the night Phil died.
"You're going home" she said.  
"Home," he replied and gave her a big hug.

So many tears right now, I need to stop typing and find a tissue.
My perspective is so small.  I want his home to be here, in Warragul, down the hall, first bedroom on the left.  Not somewhere far away where I can't see him.  But he is home, safe and sound, where we will one day be.  But in the meantime I don't feel at home without him.
Kris x

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