I caught up with a couple of different friends last week I hadn't seen since Phil died. Both of them, who didn't personally know Phil, expressed in their own ways how sad they had been when they received word that Phil had died. It was strangely very comforting to me to know that other people were sad too, like actually really sad. Sad enough to go home from work. I think it's hard to know what to do, people don't want to upset us, or make it seem that their pain is the same, but it was so nice to see someone else sad, (I think I had started to think I was making it up, or overreacting), because it is actually sad, whether someone knows Phil or not it is still sad that someone had to suffer like he did and that we don't have a little brother here with us anymore.
That aside, Christmas has practically arrived, our tree is up and some of the normal Christmas things are happening but the mood isn't quite the same. Not sad as such, but not the busy, crazy, intense time that it usually is. It's kinda like Christmas has taken a chill pill.
I made some photo books on my computer with pics of Phil for our family and they arrived in the mail yesterday so that's something nice.
Nothing else to say, other than the fact that a random hawaiian christmas carol that noone my age except me and my siblings would know is playing on the radio and Mel and I were singing along very loudly while writing this.
Love Kris
P.s. I finished the essay! Melinda is officially a nurse, starting work in Melb in April. I'm doing a coffee shop (similiar to beach mission) at Wye River from after Christmas to start of January and then will be in QLD with Renay till start of college. Everyone else will be having a bit of a quiet one. Also...Jenny got an A in her grade 6 piano exam, an achievement!
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Congrats to all of you! Grade 6 is one step below levitating while you play Rachmaninoff with your mind, right? Impressive... and it sounds nice to have a Christmas break before nursing/college next year. Hope you all enjoy the time off.
ReplyDeleteAnd as for Phil-related sadness--my boyfriend can attest to a few days of leading me away from computers in tears, lots of fragile days and I still miss him. Our pain is nothing like yours but it's tough to know that his occasional facebook chats and updates won't come around again. All of you guys are in our thoughts and prayers. Just comforted by the fact that this is going to be Phil's best Christmas ever. Love you all, Elisabeth :^/
I wasn't personally sad about Phil until the night before the funeral (coz I only met him once) and then it hit me that I was going to the funeral of a seventeen-year-old kid and that there was nothing right about that, even if you didn't know him. And if you did,...well, Kris, you're not overreacting! I love you lots. You did such a great job at Hayley's wedding!
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